22/30 Things: Future Self

22. Where do you see yourself in 5, 10, 15 years?


     In 5 years I hope to be teaching with at least one child of my own.  I see our backyard being completely finished and it has become the mecca I've pictured it to be. I see us completely out of debt except for maybe the house and my student loans. This will allow us to start planning trips and remodels to the house that we have been dreaming about since we bought it.

     In 10 years I hope that we have at least one more child.  I would like to see that we have taken some bigger trips, maybe a cruise to Alaska or the Carribean and maybe a trip to Europe.  I also see myself as finishing up a doctorate in education and maybe working up to becoming a Principal.

     In 15 years I hope that my husband has been able to retire.  I also hope that we have enough savings to drastically cut back on the hours I have had to work.  I also hope that we have spent a lot of time visiting Ireland and made friends that keep pulling us back across the sea.  Most of this is all do-able if we can become debt free.  And that just takes some time. 

21/30 Things: Superpowers

21. If you could have one superpower what would it be? And what is the first thing you would do with it?


     If I could have just one superpower I would have to choose flight.  It was a hard choice for me because when I think about it I would love to be like Wonder Woman or Supergirl, but what is the biggest thing that they both have in common? Flight...I can work on being strong and fighting for justice....I can find magical things that will help my crime fighting abilities, but flight has to be a power that I already have.  

     I think the first thing I would do with my flight...is see the places across the globe that I know I'll never be able to go.  Then I would purchase some land in the one country that I have ALWAYS wanted to live and build a home base...from there I would find investors to back my venture into crime fighting and build a vast JUSTICE LEAGUE EMPIRE!!!!  Finding others just like me who have super powers.


     Yea, yea, it's just a dream...but it's a good one I think...right? 

     

20/30 Things: Childhood

20.  Describe 3 significant memories from childhood.

1) I guess my first biggest memory would be of traveling from Spokane, Washington to Rogers, Arkansas every summer to visit my grandparents.  It was fun bring them school projects we had completed telling about the state from an outsiders perspective.  It was also nice because at the time my maternal grandparents had a farm house out in what is now called Pinnacle Hills area of Rogers.  

2)  My second significant memory would be of my mom and stepdad's divorce and everything that resulted from that.  Up until that moment I knew I had a biological father, but he wasn't very present in my life.  So to leave my dad and step siblings and embark on a new future with my mom was super scary.  We ended up living with my grandparents for awhile and I really enjoyed that.  It actually helped me develop a closer bond with my grandparents and my great grandma.  

3)  My last significant memory from childhood would be moving to Fort Smith.  Again my mother was seeking for something new and left all our family and friends behind for a church down here. Now at first I was resistant. I wanted to go to my mom's alma mater, I wanted to stay with my best friend and go to high school with her and not leave my boyfriend.  But truthfully when I look back at it...it lead me to some really great people in my life.  I was introduced to two woman that would be come my best friends.

19/30 Things: Live

19. If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?

This was like the easiest post yet.  My heart always has and always will belong in Ireland!!! 







Wicklow Mountains



 Why...I really can't explain it.  I have always felt this pull to be a part of Ireland.  I guess if I couldn't ever live there...I would settle to visit there and stay for maybe a month.

Another place I would love to live is Michigan.  Russ' family is from Ludington/Scottville area of Michigan and we go every year to visit.  I just love the mild summers and harsh winters they have there.  I have as of yet to get anywhere other than Grand Rapids in the state to visit, but I just know that Michigan is another place I would love to live.

18/30 Things: Forgive

18.  What has been the most difficult thing you have had to forgive?


     I'm not really sure how much to share about this.  Or even if to share this.  My sister and I, for most of my life, have never really had a great relationship.  We are two completely different people with clashing personalities.  Living together was....well frankly it was hell!  Only after my sister moved out did we start to patch and repair our relationship and become best friends and sisters.  Throughout my young adult life...we've lived together several times and started the old patterns of clashing.  We've definitely realized we can't live together and still be sisters and friends. 

     A couple of years after high school my mother and I were living in a duplex and my neighbor was a young girl just like me.  But she was super popular and very friendly.  She threw parties like every weekend.  At that same time I was dating A.  He was this slick guy from my college choir class and I sat and sang next to him for a year before he "noticed" me.  We were pretty good friends before he even let on that he "crushed" on me.  We started dating.  My mother hated him with a passion.  He was the quintessential college guy.  He smoked...cigarettes and pot, but never around me.  He drank a lot, and was very sexually active.  After the first couple of times of trying to push me into sex...he respected my wishes and stopped the pressure.  I also made a huge mistake by telling him that if he REALLY needed it...he could go outside of our relationship and sleep with someone, but only in a emergency situation and I would only look the other way once.  Yes, it was a form of a test.  Yes, it was pretty wrong of me to test him like that. 

      One particular party night A and I went to neighbors, party and drank and mingled and had a great time.  Of course, my sister was there with her best friend at the time.  I had to be to work early the next morning so I had to leave the party at a semi-reasonable hour.  A walked me home and we kissed a bit and then he left.

     That night I had the worst dream of my life.  I could hear my sister moaning and groaning...because....well you know why.  When I woke up (deeply disturbed) I started thinking about it and the first thought that crossed my mind was she and A had been together...in my garage.  So I confronted my sister...told her about the dream I had and listened to her tell me it was just that...a dream.  I asked A about it and he confirmed it was a dream. 

     I went along with this for about two months, before the dream I was about to give up on my waiting for marriage and give away this precious gift, after the dream I didn't feel right and decided to wait.  I had finally decided to give A that gift again and was talking to my friend B about it when she finally broke down and told me.  The dream I had wasn't a dream, but my brain actually hearing it happen and trying to let me know.  My sister had lied to my face while looking at me in the eyes.  And A had lied to me as well.  I had it out with my sister and told her to get lost from my life cause this wasn't the first time she had done stuff with my boyfriends, but it was the farthest, and forgave A because as he put it...I told him he got one emergency outside of the relationship thing.  It wasn't but a month later I told him to get lost also because he could have slept with any girl on the planet, but he chose my sister....that was just unforgivable. 

     It took me years to finally forgive and forget with my sister.  To trust her around my boyfriends again and to allow our relationship to prosper.  Today...we have a great relationship that I would have never dreamed possible, but because the Lord dug around in my heart and made me face these issues...I was able to be a better Child of God, forgive and in turn be a better sister.

17/30 Things: Great

17. What is something you wish you were great at?


     I guess it's a combination of being a concert violinist and a singer.  I have a beautiful voice...according to A LOT of people.  But there are so many other people out there that I believe have so much better voices than I do.  I would even settle for just having a local band that plays in pubs around town.  But, sadly being an asthmatic seriously hampers my ability to be in a bar for long periods of time...and most bands here in the river valley are male bands. 

     I could probably be a concert violinist, but only if I picked my violin back up and practiced for hours everyday to get back to the point I was in high school.  I guess realistically if I could just start a music guild in my SCA Kingdom of Glen Abhann that would be enough for me.  To play period pieces and be the person in the kingdom to go to for music would be such a great accomplishment...I think that would satisfy my wish.

16/30 Things: Accomplished

16. What are 5 of your greatest accomplishments?

1. Being ranked 15th in the state in All State Orchestra. 

It was and always has been a high light of my life

and one of my greatest accomplishments.

2. Meeting and Marrying my Prince Charming.

Russ and I's lives before meeting weren't a walk in the park by any

stretch of the imagination...and I had serious commitment issues (just ask several previous boyfriends.)  But I allowed myself to just "see where it goes" and to trust that God knew what he was doing when he planned for me to meet Russ.

3. Staying really tight with my best friends.

Lyndsey, Tiffany, and Ashley have seen some pretty dark days with me and are still around to giggle, laugh at and with me, and still love me unconditionally because of them.  These three women are not only my best friends, but my sisters.  Just think of the movie Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood...and that's what we're like.  (YA YA!!!)

4.  Having the compassion to forgive.

There are several times in my life that family or friends have done things that are inexcusable...I have overcome those obstacles to save my relationships with them.  This really wouldn't have happened if I hadn't started to trust God and give every thing up to him.

5. My Strength.

In high school...I wasn't strong...I wasn't even remotely close to having the strength to be a rule breaker or change the course of my life that my mother had set out for me.  But going through said hardships that gave me the courage to forgive, and placing my trust in God, gave me strength to follow what God wanted for my life.  Leaving a church that my mother raised me in that didn't feel right for me.